I was just thinking about my post earlier, and I think I’ve caught my train of thought.
What I was saying about homogeneous pairing – some studies may say it’s genetic – it certainly seems psychological to want to be with someone who is a lot like yourself – but I’d wager there are people out there like me, who don’t want to be with someone like themselves, or be with someone who they want to be like – people like me just want to be with someone who can catch the things they can’t, you know?
I guess what I’m saying is that I’ve had plenty of time to think about my life, and why I am where I am.
If you know me, you know that my wife, Sukie, is nothing like me. What you might not know is that this is one of the things I really like about her. When I met her, I was a devout grunge/punk intellectualist. I tried to think about the deep things, like why we’re here, and why the world owes me big time, and what I was going to do with my life. She was a very bright, very spunky girl, who listened to hiphop and kicked ass. I was immediately attracted to such kick-ass-ness, but didn’t make moves as that’s not really my style.
If you know me really well, you’ll know that I met her during a rough time in my life, a time that I’ve spent many hours reflecting on – you know? The very crucible of my life, where there were many paths (this reminds me of a Lauryn Hill song I might drop out a bit later) to take.
I guess what I’m really getting at is that I really appreciate my heterogeneous pairing. It’s been a great experience, being with someone who isn’t like me at all. Because we don’t have a lot of common ground, there isn’t that expectancy or the requirement to stay the same – our commitment is more important than our differences, and so the focus is on the ‘together’ aspect, rather than on the individual.